AWKWARD STAGE

He met me in a awkward stage in my life Getting a divorce Living on my own Finding out who I am Am I Dom Am I Nikki Or am I Dominique? I am in a awkward stage I am learning my likes, dislikes What I like to eat What I like to do for fun How I want to dress Who I want to associate myself with When it was okay to say yes and when I should say no What’s my type? What SHOULDN’T be my type I had to ask myself was I ready to have sex again He met me when I didn’t know these things I didn’t know if I WANTED to start dating Let alone know what that really was I didn’t know if I just wanted hookups Someone to take me out Someone to tell me I’m pretty and rub my booty What I KNOW I needed was a friend I needed someone to listen I needed positive energy I needed those hugs To rub my back To kiss my forehead Call me babygirl AND from time to time rub my booty When he met me I was still healing Fighting my demons Fighting this LACK of self-esteem I told him I had a cold heart I showed him I did I blocked out love Felt like I DIDN’T NEED it Didn’t want it He seen the broken little girl that hides inside I let him see her I still closed up I am in a awkward stage in my life where I am still learning life I am learning who I am and what I like This awkward stage in my life where I am learning to enjoy MY OWN company Also, i miss company of others When met him I wasn’t supposed to like him Wasn’t supposed to enjoy his company Wasn’t supposed to crave his touch I wanted to be COLD, to prove that I didn’t need it This awkward stage in my life, I WAS lying to myself I don’t want you to fix me, I want you by my side while I fix myself. DiaryofDom

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